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| I'm bummed, dude. Leijah's gone back to Michigan. I know she'll be happier there, but at the same time, it sucks that she had to go back. Yesterday night was both special and depressing. Haha. Tess thought I stuck a bloody finger in her car... when it was 10 dollars for gas. That definitely amused me. I know something I havent really elaborated on or even mentioned in a long time. The opposite sex! Well, basically, I'm just waiting around for the right guy to come to me. Obviously, there are some really cute guys I have my eyes on... but theyre gonna make the move. I've been rejected enough to know not to do that. I'm being friendly with them, they get to take the next step. Yeah, so my life is pretty dull right now... I have a cross country meet in the morning. And I was almost attacked by a squirrel today. I sat up in a tree for about an hour, hour and a half. T'was windy, so it was kinda freaky when the whole tree moved. But I was sitting there, taking pictures, and I heard/saw something scattered off. I could have been eaten alive, man ..or at the very least, gotten rabies. Sooo.. that's my random, pointless, something-you-just-wasted-2-minutes-of-your-time-reading story for the day :]]] I found it interesting, so I decided to share. That's all. Yeah, my life is pretty entertaining, right? psh, not. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmango. <3
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| .. is surrounding me. It's everywhere. In cross country, in softball, in my own mind, and in a multitude of other places. And I can't dig myself out of this hole. I feel as if I were standing on what I thought to be solid ground, and upon looking down, I realize that people are digging holes around me. They're chipping away whats left of the ground I stand on, too. My only choice is to jump down with them, or hurt myself trying to jump to higher ground, falling into the pit anyway. Ironically enough, I just wrote an essay titled "What I Know For Sure Is This," and I said: "Optimistic and pessimistic attitudes are contagious, and affect your company and those around you." Of course, the day after I turn it in, I have a much better personal story I could have voiced as my example. I just want the weekend to come. I want to quit fooling myself. I want to quit saying my crush will call me or message me or keep in touch, to quit thinking things will work out, dispite the enormous distance between us. I want to stop, but I feel like in doing so, I'll be bringing myself down further. Honestly, he's probably forgotten all about me and moved on. I should be moving on too, but its easier said than done. I want to just go to sleep, and I want summer back. This is why I love summer, and I'm going to miss it like none other. Because whenever summer rolls around, I'm a much more happy, upbeat person. School, with the work, unavoidable drama, stress and sport-related fatigue just brings me down. Along with, as I mentioned before, the pessimistic attitudes of others around me. I feel like I'm being swallowed by it. Its overwhelming to think about it. God.. help me. | | |
| HOLY SHIIIIIIIIIT. its summer. took long enough to come. actually, sophmore year went fairly quickly for me. obviously, parts went faster than others.. like spanish was ALWAYS a drag. but for the most part, it went very fast. i feel so old.. im going to be a junior next year. wooooooow. im sad im taking summer school though. 5 freakin hours of algebra I... thats like 3928572395623x worse than spanish. and spanish is hard to beat lol. well thats all. i havent updated in quite some time. yeah and that guy i wrote about in the previous entry is a jerk. a lying jerk. liars = not good in kaitlins book. for future notice. <3 | | |
| i find a guy thats pretty much everything ive ever wanted; athletic funny cute flirty confident fun to be with mature ...everything but musical. its mainly the athletic & mature part that gets me... cause it seems to me that there arent too many athletic boys that are crazy, truly mature. but hes MOVING. so nothing can ever happen. why me? i find someone, & then they cant stay. of course, just my luck. that would happen to me. gah. sadness, gratefulness, disappointment,& just a little skip of a beat in my heart.. im not going to say heartbreak cause i dont think its that major. it just tugs at something in my heart, & it hurts. & makes me want to cry. -sighs- so much for THAT plan. =[ | | |
| im writing more than normal. haha. this week has not been good to me.
in both mental and physical forms of the word.
besides anything fatal,
you could name anything, and its probably happened to me in the past 7 days.
holy shit.
god seems to not like me this week. i guess its what i get for going to a softball tryout wednesday instead of church. | | |
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